Meeting your in-laws for the festive season: the do’s and don’ts

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Meeting your in-laws for the festive season: the do’s and don’ts
Ansa Lange is a life coach, parenting coach, therapist and trauma counsellor. PHOTO: SUPPLIED

As the festive season brings couples together with their families, there are unspoken rules to navigate.

Accredited life coach, trauma counsellor and parenting coach Ansa Lange helps couples, meeting their in-laws for the first time, demonstrate their willingness to contribute to the festivities.

When it comes to meeting your in-laws for the first time, it is important to know what topics to discuss and which ones to avoid.

“Express genuine curiosity about your partner’s family, listen out for clues when they speak about what they like or dislike, and make mention of it again later in a relatable conversation,” said Lange.

Although it can be brought up, Lange advised that it is best to steer away from controversial topics such as religion, politics and any loaded topics that may trigger strong emotions.

Make sure that you set a warm and respectful tone when visiting your significant other’s home. “To further set a warm tone, consider bringing a small gift to the festivities as a way to show your appreciation.

If you do not know what the family likes or values yet, a bunch of flowers is always a safe option,” said Lange. When the dreaded ex-partner is brought up, it is crucial to stay calm and composed.

Try to listen to what is said from a kind, neutral and compassionate point of view. Make sure to be mindful of the family’s beliefs and traditions when it comes to drinking alcohol.

Create a lasting impression by simply being you. “Just be you and truly connect with those around you.

Make mental notes of what issues to avoid next year. Be mindful of any specific skills you would like to gain to navigate family visits more positively,”

Abigail Visagie

Abigail@mahareng.co.za

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