If you blink, Chuck is gone

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Chuck Lorre

If you haven’t heard of Chuck Lorre I’m sure that you at least know some of the popular sitcoms he created.
Remember Cybill in the mid-1990s? That was Lorre. Dharma & Greg, Two and a Half Men, The Big Bang Theory, Mike & Molly, Mom and more recently, Young Sheldon, are all super successful comedy creations of the American television writer, producer and composer, Chuck Lorre.
Chuck is also famous for his quirky “vanity cards”. Typically, at the end of every episode of his productions, he includes a written “message” to the viewer, which is shown for only a few short seconds. If you blink an eye, they’re gone. Chuck’s notes cannot be read unless you press the pause button at exactly the right moment.
I cannot remember when I first noticed Chuck’s cards. It was probably midway through Two and a Half Men. Since then I’ve become addicted to these messages that usually read like an essay or observation on life and are often screamingly funny.
In Vanity Card #01, which aired following the first episode of Dharma & Greg, Chuck shared some of his “personal beliefs”, including the fact that he thought his children were secretly proud of him and that he had a great dog, “maybe the greatest dog in the whole wide world, yes he is!” Then this statement: “I believe that beer is a gateway drug that leads, inevitably, to vodka and somebody oughta do something about it”.
Chuck has written nearly 600 vanity cards in which he muses about life and showbiz. I find them refreshing and uplifting. “In public bathrooms I will sometimes use the ‘children’s urinal’ in order to feel like a giant”. Or this one: “I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. I don’t have crazy, reckless sex with strangers. If Charlie Sheen outlives me, I’m gonna be really pissed”.
You should consider joining the Chuck Lorre Vanity Card Fan Club. But you’ll have to practise your skills with the remote. One has to be quick on the draw…

ALBÉ GROBBELAAR